k i just got home its 3 am im pretty drunk still but i think this post will make good sense anyway. i decided tonight im not gonna play poker for a week. i need to concentrate on school, and i now realize how much more important friends are. Ive made Alot of new ones this semester and ive been goin out alot and honestly i just dont have time for poker right now plus i think i will find new and more productive things with to do. I have a postive bb/100 right now but a negative $ total of 10k b/c i lost a 13k pot with KK vs ATo on a 249 flop vs. fuckin Elky's bitch ass.
also, i broke up with my gf 4 days ago. she really wants to get back together. i feel ridiculously bad and shes taking it way worse than i thought. I REALLY need a break tho, we both were taking each other for granted way tooooo much. i KNOW this will be good for me cuz i have a few other girls in mind, one in particular, and i hope she becomes a little more independent. I guess u could say were on a break cuz i Really think we might get back together eventually but i know i HAVE to date other girls and at least see wut else is out there. some of my friends agree, most guy friends call me an idiot cuz they say shes so hot. i still never told her i cheated on her, really hope she doesnt find out. i dont think she wiill. i was tempted today to ask her back out when i saw her, she of course tried and planned to look extra good to make me jealous and it worked in a way. Honestly pretty much any guy would love to go out with her, so sometimes i wonder who i think i am to break up with her, and a few guys have told me, joe wtf are u thinking, every guy wants her, u are just too used to having her. really im just confused and dn wut the fuck i want right now besides other cute girls however bad that sounds. trust me out of 30k kids at mizzou there are PLENTY of beautifull girls. anyway i think this break will be good for me and make mre realize a few things, then maybe ill realizre im better w/o her, maybe ill realize i was taking her for granted and want her back for good- which i could really see happening. shes awesome. shes told me she wants to marry me,. and in a message today she told me "unlike her, she doesnt think she'll ever find any1 better than me, but apparently i do" although its mean she makes me feel good. she loved me more than i even knew and i feel terrible when she cries to me but i just have to stick with it for now. 3 weeks at Least, and i told her that, and in general shes been sad but real cool about it. shes an awesome girl.
wow sry if that went on forever im still pretty damn drunk tho im not gonna lie it took me like 9 times to remoember my password to get on to here.
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